Category Archives: Family Therapy

We Saw Kinky’s Ass!

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While Meloney and her kids were here, we took the time to go visit the Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch.  This is a no-kill rescue facility for dogs, though they’ve also rescued a duck, pigs, cats and even a few donkeys.  The land for the rescue is owned by our very own, Kinky Friedman.  He’s a hoot, and if he were to run for governor again, I’d vote for him hands-down.  In years gone by, he was known in country music as the “Singing Jew”.  Since then, he’s become a wanna-be politician, an author, a dog-saver and he also runs a family-owned ranch for kids.

Cousin Nancy and Cousin Tony (dog rescuers) were at the local library last week and gave all of the kids in attendance a talk about what they did and some fun stories about their dogs and some folks who have helped them throughout the years.  It was a fun presentation, and Cousin Nancy has also written two books (that both of my older girls devoured) about stories at the ranch.  On Saturday, Cousin Nancy took us on a tour of their facilities.  Both Meloney and I are Girl Scout leaders and we have girls interested in working with the Rescue Ranch to earn their Bronze and Silver awards.  Not to mention that our troops, as well as my husband’s Cub Scout pack, are interested in organizing tours for our scouts.

After reading Cousin Nancy’s second book, DD#2 remembered that Cousin Nancy encouraged folks to bring snacks for the residents of the ranch, so she grabbed some carrots when we left the house, so the kids could feed the donkeys.  They weren’t down with the dogs, so Cousin Nancy took us on a little tour of the rest of the ranch and up by Kinky’s house, we found three donkeys and a beautiful horse.  Unfortunately, Kinky wasn’t home, but we did get to see his ass!


Kinky’s Ass, Cousin Nancy & our Kids at Echo Hill Ranch

Swimming in the River

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My quilter, Meloney, and her two children came and spent a night in the country last weekend.  I had to laugh when I asked her if she got lost.  She said, “No, but I followed your directions to a T – but, I still wasn’t sure we were going to actually find you because you are so far out in the middle of nothing!”

So true.  And we LIKE it that way!

While they were here, we took my two youngest kids and her daughter and son swimming in the Medina river.  They all had a great time and enjoyed their time in the cool water.

My Mother Committed Suicide

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If you’ve ever read my “100 FAQs“, you’ll know that I mention that my mother committed suicide.  Mom’s parents, my grandparents, went to their graves believing it was an accident.  I don’t disagree, to a point.  As far as I remember, the official death certificate said that she died of alcohol and drug poisoning, exacerbated by an epileptic seizure.  I never knew my mom had epilepsy – still don’t have a universal agreement of that from her family, either.

What I do know is that my mother was mentally ill, and her psychiatrist prescribed Antabuse as a way to help her stay away from alcohol.   This drug is supposed to make you sick (vomiting, upset stomach) if you drink alcohol on top of taking the medicine.  

Now, my mother had been in and out of both psychiatric hospitals as well as alcohol treatment centers most of my life.  We knew she had regular bouts of “sickness” and we were rarely left home alone with her.  My dad (and whomever he could find in the family to help him) was basically the one to raise us, after we were beyond the baby-stage of life.  But, Dad worked full time, so it was up to us to find our own fun.  Mom definitely loved her babies.  It’s been said to me that she liked her children until they got to the talking stage, and then she was ready for another baby.  Unfortunately, our last baby brother died of SIDS when he was 3 months old, and the rest of my childhood was lost as Mom spiraled in and out of herself.  Within a few short years, Mom had to have a hysterectomy and was unable to bear anymore children.  This is when her life spiraled even more out of control, because this is when she was introduced to prescription painkillers. 

Our mother abandoned us a year before she died, so she saved us from finding her dead.  As I understand everyone (and I’ve talked to nearly every family member I can find about this), Mom was living in an apartment with a married man.  He had gone home for the weekend to see his own family and left her alone.  Mom definitely had issues with being alone, especially after my dad died.  She was taking the Antabuse and then began drinking on top of it – and she drank so much, so fast, that it killed her.  Whether she had an epileptic seizure or not is not something factored in, when I’m thinking of the way her life ended – the amount of alcohol consumed in such a short period of time was enough to kill her, whether she had a seizure or not.

I bring all of this up because a loved one recently told me she attempted suicide a few months ago.  And it totally threw me for a loop this week.  She didn’t succeed, thankfully!  But, she did agree that God wasn’t ready for her yet – and that perhaps me needing her in my life was the reason for that.  That sure makes me feel loved, even if the process of her getting to me (she is not biologically related to me) was through her darkness and into the light.  She’s on the road to recovery, making changes in her life, and hoping to visit us this year. 

I don’t know what I’d do if someone I loved chose to end their life.  That’s a tough one for me, especially because of the scars that were left by my mother.  But, I do know that there IS help, and hope – even if you don’t know it at the time.

Back-to-School Fair

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Last week, a local church had a back-to-school fair.  I’ve never attended one, but then we’ve probably never been in the financial position we are in right now.  I needed help with the kids’ school supplies, and thought this would be a great opportunity to get some help without strings.

First, I want to publicly thank The First Assembly of God Church in Kerrville, Texas.  This is a God-given calling they have received, and they did a fantastic job of bringing the community professionals and businesses together who worked with volunteers to offer something local for those who were in need. 

There were stations set up within their church.  Backpacks with a starter set of supplies for kids, bike helmets, shoes, haircuts, immunizations, sport’s physicals, eye exams, lunch, groceries and a prayer station.  Did I mention everything was free?  No strings, no tax returns – nothing needed except for you to show up (and wait for an hour in the hot Texas sun), fill out a simple form and move forward to the stations you needed to get into. 

Our kids got backpacks with supplies, shoes, lunch and groceries.  One daughter received two immunizations as well.

And I thank God for the blessings this church and their volunteers and participating professionals & donators has bestowed upon my family.  It’s just one step ahead of the back-to-school empty-my-already-empty-wallet puzzle that we needed.

I hope next year, I can get our church involved to help them out, too.

Is Webster’s Just an Opinion?

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Our oldest daughter (the artist) asked for, and received, some artist’s fine point markers for her birthday last week.  After she read the instructions and played with them a while, she made a poster for her door.  It does point out some very good gifts that she has … but, ummm, I’m a little concerned about the spelling on a couple of them (she is very gifted in school).  Her dad, on the other hand, believe’s Webster’s is just an opinion, so it’s nothing to worry about.  hmmmm